New Coming-Out Guide for Queer Christians from the Author of Refocusing My Family

What does the coming-out process look like for LGBTQ Christians, especially when they do not feel safe, affirmed, or supported in their communities? LGBTQ Christians can be haunted by feelings of depression, despair, and thoughts of suicide as they try to reconcile their faith with their sexuality. Author and LGBTQ advocate, Amber Cantorna (Refocusing My Family), has been there before. As the daughter of a thirty-year-plus Focus on the Family executive, Cantorna was cast out of her community when she came out. However, Cantorna found acceptance and healing through her faith, and seeking out an affirming church to support her in her journey. Now as part of her work dedicated to reconnecting LGBTQ Christians with their faith, Cantorna offers her latest book, Unashamed: A Coming-Out Guide for LGBTQ Christians.

“LGBTQ Christians are desperate for guidance on how to navigate the unexpected journey of coming out,” Cantorna writes. “They’ve been backed into a corner by religion, taught to be ashamed of who they are, and have lived in fear of being abandoned by both God and those they love if the truth about their identity leaks out. They want to live authentically, but they lack the needed resources to guide them.”

In this handy guide, LGBTQ people of faith will find personal and practical advice for the coming-out process. Unashamed tackles such topics as internalized homophobia, re-establishing your worth as a child of God, finding an affirming faith community, and deciding when and how to come out. In her accessible and compassionate style, Cantorna equips LGBTQ Christians for the coming-out process, helps them create communities that will support and love them during the journey, and offers a bridge to re-establish their relationship with God. Unashamed: A Coming-Out Guide to LGBTQ Christians released from Westminster John Knox Press on March 12, 2019 and is available to order now.

Amber Cantorna is a national speaker and educator, and the author of Refocusing My Family: Coming Out, Being Cast Out, and Discovering the True Love of God. As a leader dedicated to supporting LGBTQ people through their coming-out process, Cantorna uses her platform to inspire others and works to dissolve shame, foster self-acceptance, and generate a message of love and inclusion for all. 


“Unashamed is a step-by-step guide to liberation, a manual for answering that holy call to stand in our own God-given skin and be exactly who we are. No apologies. No atonement. Cantorna speaks plainly to the threats—internal and external—faced by many LGBTQ+ Christians, and offers strategies first for survival and, in time, for roaring freedom.”
 – Linda Kay Klein, author of PURE: Inside the Evangelical Movement that Shamed a Generation of Young Women and How I Broke Free, and Founder of Break Free Together

“Unashamed is a heartfelt, supportive resource for LGBTQ Christians finding their place in the church and in the world. I’m so glad Amber Cantorna created such a vital and important work.”
-Mike McHargue, host of Ask Science Mike, cofounder of The Liturgists, and author of Finding God in the Waves

“Amber Cantorna beautifully radiates God’s love and hope for all God’s children as she masterfully weaves together helpful action steps and stories that are both informative & empowering. Unashamed: A Coming-Out Guide for LGBT Christians is filled with golden nuggets of hope, healing and truth that everyone can benefit from; whether you are an LGBTQ Christian looking for assistance and encouragement in the coming out process, an ally or parent seeking to support a loved one in the process, or simply someone interested in transforming and growing in the ever-faithful compassion and love of God. Unashamed is a must read for everyone!”
-Jane Clementi, Co-Founder and CEO, The Tyler Clementi Foundation

“Amber Cantorna has done it again.  After the success of her book Refocusing My Family, Amber has returned with a practical, readable guide to the challenges of living authentically. In Unashamed: A Coming-Out Guide for LGBTQ Christians, Amber speaks with the wisdom of someone who has lived through the kind of shame only evangelicalism can impart.  For those with the courage to let the world know who they are, Unashamed will guide you, lovingly and competently, one step at a time.”
-Paula Stone Williams, Pastor, TED Speaker, LGBTQ Advocate

“As the mother of a gay son, Unashamed is the book I wish my child would’ve had when he came out. With practicality, compassion, and wisdom that comes from personal experience, Amber Cantorna broaches coming out in a way that no other book has done. As both a mother and the leader of Free Mom Hugs, this is a book I will most definitely recommend to all LGBTQ Christians who are on the journey of embracing their deepest, truest selves.”
-Sara Cunningham, Founder of Free Mom Hugs and author of How We Sleep at Night: A Mother’s Memoir

“As the gay, closeted son of a Southern Baptist pastor, I didn’t think I’d ever come out. It was too scary. But in my late 20s, I began to plan my coming out process. I was paralyzed with fear. I had no guidance, no resources, and very little confidence. I felt like the only person in the world who’d gone through this. Thanks to Amber Cantorna’s book, Unashamed, no closeted Christian LGBTQ person should ever have to feel this way again. This book clearly and practically lays out a set of best practices for people who want to come out but aren’t sure how. Coming out is never easy, but, thanks to Amber, it just got a whole lot easier.”
-B.T. Harman, Creator of the Blog & Podcast Blue Babies Pink

“This is Amber Cantorna at her best!  She takes the nitty-gritty experiences that every LGBTQ person of faith experiences and breaks them down in an incredibly accessible way.  Everyone who reads this book will leave with a greater understanding of what it is to be queer and a deeper understanding of steps to take that will lead towards wholeness in accepting God’s love for all.  Reading it feels like having a personal coach on all things LGBTQ and Christian.  It’s just so good!
-Candice Czubernat, Founder and Therapist at The Christian Closet

“I wish I could go back and give this book to 15 year old me. Amber has expertly consolidated advice born from people who have previously walked this road of faith and coming out. If you find this book in your hands, consider yourself lucky. May it light your path.”
– Matthias Roberts, Psychotherapist and Host of Queerology: A Podcast on Belief and Being

“Unashamed: A Coming-Out Guide for LGBTQ Christians is bound to be an enduring addition to the resource shelf for LGBTQ Christians and others seeking to support them. Speaking with the authority of someone who has persevered through her own difficult coming out, Amber Cantorna puts into words the lessons many of us have had to learn through hard-fought trial and error. What’s most compelling about the book is the breadth of wisdom it offers on the coming-out process, from the practical (such as considering one’s safety and self-sufficiency before coming out) to the emotional (such as tending to one’s own grieving heart in the face of rejection). This book is full of candid advice that is relevant to anyone navigating the challenging season of coming out.”
-David and Constantino Khalaf, authors of Modern Kinship: A Queer Guide to Christian Marriage

“Every new journey can be terrifying, none more so than the path to a more authentic version of ourselves. In Unashamed, Amber Cantorna provides a clear, encouraging, and life-giving travel companion for LGBTQ Christians walking into the wide open spaces of their truest selves—and for the people who love them. It will be an invaluable tool for those navigating the personal and relational challenges of coming-out, and essential reading for allies hoping to walk alongside well.”
-John Pavlovitz, author of A Bigger Table and Hope and Other Superpowers

“Amber Cantorna’s Unashamed is a rich yet intensely practical resource for every LGBT+ person who is wrestling to step out of the closet within a Christian context. For so many LGBT+ Christians, there is a profound sense of loneliness and disorientation as we seek to navigate coming out and reconciling our faith and sexuality. This book boldly shines the light of truth and love, helping to guide the reader on a path away from shame and towards wholeness as they embrace their God-given queer identity. I will be recommending this book to the many brave LGBT+ Christians I know who are embarking on this journey of liberation.” 
-Rev. Brandan Robertson, Lead Pastor, Missiongathering San Diego and author of True Inclusion: Creating Communities of Radical Embrace 

“Amber Cantorna speaks with the voice of experience; her own and those who have reached out to her for guidance. Amber provides tools for members of the LGBTQ community and those who love them, to come out, set boundaries, and flourish as wonderfully created children of God. As a member of clergy and psychotherapist, this book will be recommended reading for my congregants and clients who need to know they are loved by God just as they are.”
-Nicole M. Garcia, M.Div., M.A. LPC

“Unashamed is an insightful guide particularly intended for evangelical Christians who’s gay or transgender identity has led to broken relationships. Amber Cantorna’s personal experience provides practical suggestions for those navigating the rocky road of coming out. She provides hope for those who have experienced rejection from both church and family while recognizing that families with LGBTQ members all have a coming out process. Best of all is the truth that unconditional love is possible.”  
-Jean Hodges, PFLAG National President Emerata

“Narratives like this are sorely needed to fill the void that LGBTQ people of faith often experience as we navigate our families, friends, and those who say they love us but not our LGBTQ identity. Cantorna uses her personal experience to help those who are seeking to reconcile their faith with their sexual orientation or gender identity. She fosters family relationships and open dialogue with others in their faith communities. It is a very welcome resource and will prove helpful to many.”   
– Lisbeth M Meléndez Rivera, Director of Faith Outreach & Training, Human Rights Campaign

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